L a s t S u m m e r;

Friday, October 29, 2004

sick and tired

video marathon as usual... what a homebuddy right? nah, am just so tamad to leave the house and also am saving money for good. :) grabe i was thrilled by gothika, woah! scary! ;) anyway, i'm sick... i hate it. damn colds! and now i have a fever. tsk tsk. my friends thought it was because of johnson, hah! johnson syndrome? what the... well let's be fair, maybe. hehe. i must admit am still not over him, kahit sabihin ko na ok na ako and that i'm moving on... parang hindi kasi, i still can't forget him, there were times nga that i just cry and become sad pero good thing naoovercome ko naman. it just takes time you know. someday i know i'll wake up having no feelings for him anymore, and i guess mabibigay ko na sa kanya yung totoong forgiveness... nagtext nga siya kanina lang and he's still trying to bring me back and clear his name, pero kahit gusto kong maniwala dahil mahal ko pa siya... ayoko na eh. masyado nakong nasaktan and wala nakong tiwala sa kanya, hatred nalang ang nararamdaman ko. they say nga na follow your heart and don't let your mind rule you, basta something like that. pero you can't blame me, once na masaktan ka mahirap na magbakasakali and mag-try ulit eh... mahirap na magtiwala. well, if he's really the one for me fate will bring us back together, i'm not closing my doors naman. gawd! tama na nga ang drama...

i'm looking forward to what tomorrow brings, what happens next and what life would be... now that i'm single again and learned a lesson from that experience. it made me stronger and wiser... alam ko na ngayon kung paano talaga magmahal. hehe. but no really, i'm a changed person now. :)

i'll be fine, love sick lang siguro. haha. ok am out.

ciao.

xx signed off at 11:11 PM

Thursday, October 28, 2004

hummm...

i was in the house all day watching videos, woah 4 in a row! hehe. didn't feel like going out, also am under some medication rin... hate pimples. gawd! what a boring city life... i'd prefer living in a province now. life's simple but fun, friends everywhere, time's slow, fresh air, cold weather, healthy food and all. aww i miss lubuagan. really miss it. i'm not satisfied with that 10-day vacation, not ready for school yet. haaaay. registration starts this nov 3 na and classes this 9. gotta be really serious this time. oh my. i'll be living in a boarding house this semester, cool! hehe. away from parents, curfews and sermon... haha. pero gotta be more responsible, well of course. i'm really excited now though i have experienced away from home for 3-4 months already. well, this time's different, i'm just hoping this would be great. it's 2am now and still can't sleep, chattin with a friend who's same old as my ex... hate that age. too boring we exchanged pics, lol. dont care if he reads this, but his eyes are really nice, cute huh. i just appreciated some of his features, lucky him to have those right? oh anyway, i'm running out of sense here... my bad. guess he fell asleep na, while chattin with me huh... it's ok. i'll be out in a minute or so, gotta rest and catch some sleep.

ciao.

xx signed off at 2:03 AM

Wednesday, October 27, 2004

karla grasa! lol

random thoughts >> how'd you find the karla grasa ad? haha. really cool huh! some of my friends have been calling me karla grasa na... lol. joey ah...

enough of that. la lang, have nothing to do kaya eto online again, nangungulit lang. oh, i'll watch vcds nalang.

ciao.

xx signed off at 12:45 PM

i have survived

i'm back now in manila... single and happier, thankyouverymuch. some things have to change, have to let go, and better to be left behind. i loved him, i still love him... but breaking up with him is the best thing i know. i don't know if he really loved me,or if he really loves me, all i know is that he cheated on me. i've been asking myself what went wrong, i've been really patient for this to come, fought for the both of us, been proud for this relationship, accepted everything he is, and been really honest... but i lost. i know i still sound sad, affected and hurt. whatever i say or do i just can't hide what's really inside. really painful but i'm moving on.

i've learned a lot from this mistake, and i have become more mature enough to understand life. u know i still have a lot in life, a lot to be happy about. life goes on.

single again, and simply loving it. it's just a matter of acceptance, and happiness is just a state of mind. :)

xx signed off at 1:54 AM

Friday, October 08, 2004

exhausted

for all the revision of papers, application for graduation, enlistment, deadlines, upcoming exams, presentations and training what do you expect of me? be cool and stay calm?! well... why not? haha. i hate this life! when will these problems be over? i wanna get rid of these. oh please. argh! life oh life... problema na nga pinoproblema pa right?

instead of boggling about it, let's just party! woohoo! :) yea the meantime way to escape the kind of life i'm dealing now... whatever.

i may be busy these days but i'm still doin good... i enjoy every bit of pressure, stress and all. this will pay off. soon!

anyway, i submitted this template to blogskins... finally i decided to publish my work! haha. i've been making templates for some time... guess have to show it to people, for them to benefit as well. aaww, i'm so nice. haha. of all my creations i love this template most... i can relate to the distance thingy. you know. and it's pink! hehe.

i've been thinking about this lately... is this relationship really worth fighting for? kaya ko pa ba? what about the future... meron ba kaming future? did i made the right decision? omg. not this time, i have a lot of things to deal with... more important things. but i know i will never run out of these questions, dont wanna get hurt, dont wanna hurt him, dont wanna hurt anybody else. siguro marami lang talaga akong problema ngayon kaya pati yung samin dalawa nahalo... marami lang talaga akong iniisip. ginagawan ko lang siguro ng issue yung situation namin ngayon, which is not good. hindi dapat maapektuhan yung relationship namin lalo na ngayon.

i'll never let these problems ruin our relationship, never.

karla, be strong and have faith. face the world with your pretty smile and with a positive attitude. go girl.

xx signed off at 11:50 PM

Tuesday, October 05, 2004

hmmm

i had my hair cut last sunday... bangs ever again! lol. i'm gonna visit the parlor again this week, probably this fri or sat.

let me tell you the good news... i'm gonna graduate this coming semester! yes you heard me right! i'm so happy and i know my parents were really proud of me. my friends and teammates were all happy for me as well. thank God! i have to be really serious this time, as in! am planning to reside in a boarding house nga eh, somewhere inside UP para mas near na mas convenient pa. i've been quite careless and easy-go-lucky the past semesters, kaya dapat magtino na ko this last sem... no more lates, absences, cutting classes, coffee break na nauuwi sa movie marathon, and stuff! "lazy karla" erased! hehe.

saw my teammates, i visited them in UP gym... grabe they were surprised, sa wakas daw am back na! no tears, drama and all, sobrang chikahan and kulitan lang. the usual! i have a whole lot of catching up to do! especially in training, and about the things that had happened and happening right now. grabe i missed a lot! pero what matters is that i'm finally back! i know namiss nila ko ng sobra... syempre ako pa! lol. we have a dinner party this thursday nga eh, good! let's say a welcome party narin for me. haha. am i so important in the team? guess so. haha. well, dapat lang! ;)

enough of that. stressed na ko sobra... i have some papers to do pa! graduating is really not so easy huh. ganito ba talaga dapat ang pinagdadaanan? what the heck! patience... patience dear. am just looking at the bright side na nga lang eh, gimik this saturday!!! yeah, that's what i meant. haha.

xx signed off at 11:10 PM

Saturday, October 02, 2004

our site

visit our blog >> johnson and karla's world. :) just started it, a bit dull pa pero drop by the site narin. thanks.

xx signed off at 11:35 PM